What's in a Name ?

 I know my husband will be horrified that I have committed my thoughts to paper (or more accurately cyberspace)  but it is something that has bothered me for several years now.

I think we made a mistake with one of our children's names and I wish I could change it !

 There I said it for all the World to see.

I read with interest this article in the   Guardian

I do feel your name dictates how people view you and although it seemed like a good idea at the time to name one of our boys after a very cool rock star.   I really, really do wish now we had gone for the famous rugby player name instead.

I had no problems with my eldest son's name.  I always, always wanted him to be called Jacob.  A strong biblical name, I read the story that he was his mother's favourite son.  As (at the time) I had no intention of having more children it appealed to me even more.

The name suits him, People call him by it and rarely shorten it to Jake.  He refers to himself as Jacob, which is always a good sign and I think the name holds him in good stead for adulthood.

When we found out we were expecting twin boys we spent a lot of time discussing names.  Should they both begin with the same initial ?  Should they be similar ?  We decided as twins they would have enough to deal with being collectively called "The Twins" and so decided on completely different initials and sounding names.

I do think like my taste in clothes, music and other areas of my life, my choice in names has changed over time.  There are of course names I would never dream of giving my children, none starters from the off, like Wayne or Kevin.  Is it snobbish ?  Is it where we live ? The family and friends who surround and influence us ?  Our aspirations for our children ? 

All that said, maybe there is some kind of devine intervention at play. My gorgeous twin already appears to be living up to the name we chose for him.  It's looking like he is not destined to be a great academic but he might, just might be a world class footballer, which suits his name just fine!

Maybe it was the right choice after all .....

Odd one out

 

You would think because my youngest boys are twins they would never be short of a friend.  Which in a way is true, but most of the time they prefer the company of friends from school.  This would be fine if it were not for the fact that both boys have developed friendships which include two other boys and the twins each seem to be the "third" friend in each the relationship.

I remember this type of friendship well from my own schooldays.  It would always end with one person not included in one way or another, usually with the "popular" child moving between the other two as they saw fit.  Arguments, jealousies and fall outs were common.

This week I have had to try to answer questions from both boys asking why they never get invited to their "friends" homes when the other boys see each other for tea after school, sleepovers and day trips out.

I try to answer best I can but am finding it increasingly difficult to explain to them why this might be happening.  I don't want to hurt their feelings and it breaks my heart to see them cry because they don't understand.

Today after another particularly upsetting episode where  one twin stood outside his friends house shouting his name because where he knew the two other boys had a play date, I angrily called him away.  I was embarrassed.

  Like many people I suppose I am insecure myself and try hard to be a nice person although I am well aware I can be curt and sharp with people at times.  I want my boys to be liked and it breaks my heart to think they are not wanted as friends.  So  I told them that actually it was probably me their mummies didn't like and not them at all.

"Well you need to get a pretty face then and then our friends will like us best".

No answer to that really.

Any advice would be really appreciated.

Time to say goodbye

Someone once told me, in business you had to know when to call it a day.

That day has come.

It's been brewing away at the back of my mind for sometime.  I have tried so hard to maintain two small businesses online, alongside a new venture at The Vintage Trading Company in Exeter, selling at various Vintage fairs and a regular slot with a group in Topsham each week.  Not to mention all the social media involved, etsy and ebay.....

and what about my home and my family ?

They have certainly suffered from me being time poor.

In recent days, weeks and months I have read with a heavy heart on twitter and facebook about tragedy affecting wonderful families whilst I have taken mine for granted. 

Tomorrow, I'll get the lego out with them.  Tomorrow,

I'll build the den out of quilts.  Tomorrow,

I'll make a big mess in the kitchen with them.  Tomorrow,

I'll go puddle jumping again.  Tomorrow.

Tomorrow has arrived.

Goodbye All About The Boys  .  It's been a blast, you gave me the courage to start my own business.  You gave me a good living in the early days but now like a long overdue love that's been lost, it's time to say goodbye.

All stock on the website is available for sale.  All reasonable offers will be considered.

I am not closing this blog but will use it as it should be used.  To document my life and my true loves

My Boys.  Nigel, Jacob, Milo and Jarvis.

I love you all so much.

I'm back !

Go get that football...........

" Can we have a dog ? "

Going back to Christmas 3 years ago, all the presents are open, paper strewn, happy faces all around.

Jarvis starts to cry.

"What's the matter sweetie ? "

"I didn't get my dog mummy, I asked Father Christmas for a dog, I promised to be a good boy and he didn't bring me one "

Floods of tears.

oh dear !  Explanations given and the excuses began

 and have continued ever since. We can't have a dog because .......


Fast forward to this weekend.


Norman came to stay....

I might be starting to waver.

Do you believe in Luck ?

Do you think people make their own luck, are born lucky or unlucky ?

The more I type the word the more jumbled up it appears.  Is that what luck is just a jumble of letters.

I saw this sign at a recent vintage fair and bought it with a breezy comment to the seller that hopefully it might change things for us.

It doesn't appear to be working.

Nice picture though.